i love you! wip!

object impermanence once something is out of my sight its out of my mind.. much like how once something is out of my life, its out of my mind . not my second ex though

love is hellfire being in love is probably the worst feeling for me both romantically and platonically . i know this is a crazy jump from the last entry but the feeling of loving and being loved is just so gross to me, even just thoughts makes me sick . probably due to some childhood trauma or whatever but tbh ? being loved isnt as bad as loving someone else because while the former does make me feel bad, the latter makes me feel worse!! coming from a guy with 3 irl exes and 1 online ex i think ive had enough of love or whatever . im over it , though this is just what i think because of my experiences ... i know a lot of happy couples both irl and online who are even planning on marrying already and while i am genuinely happy for them , i cant help but be a bit envious since ill never be able to experience something thats so precious to everyone else in the world it seems

how so very genuine of you didnt pass the upcat . im not too bummed about it because i got into my other three dream universities but it would have been a nice thing to brag about . i ended up talking about it with a friend who did pass the upcat and i remember we had an exchange where i was GEN SRS! saying congratulations to her and how its really cool but the way i said it did nottt sound genuine.. i ended up saying im not salty! i promise not salty! after everything i said to her the rest of the day because... i wasnt salty!!! she found it funny so at least there wasnt any offense taken

new beginnings to be honest ive always been really bad at writing for and about myself or my feelings etc etc so i cooked up this held together with glue and a stapler website! if you can even call it that . ill try to be more honest and authentic here i think . starting new projects is always so exciting so i hope i can commit to this! fighting!!

ill put something here later anyway hi welcome to the emilio diary i was gonna make this look pretty but i gave up and its my diary so i do what i want t

hi! we are emilio ^^ we are cohosts of the same system

emilio is made up of lillian (he/him) and valentine (she/he)

while it will mainly be lillian and valentine on here, other members might write entries too !